Hair is everything!” exclaims Phoebe Waller-Bridge (the titular character) in the show , when her sister Claire gets a haircut that looks like a “pencil.” Chopping off your hair or getting rid of the long locks is a deeply personal choice – some people choose to cut their hair in difficult times to regain control of their life, while for others, it can be a way to release control and move forward. Whatever the reason is, chopping off hair – whether you do it yourself or at a salon – isn’t just a cosmetic choice.
‘WANTED TO MOVE FORWARD IN MY LIFE AFTER A BREAKUP, SO DECIDED TO CHOP OFF MY HAIR’
When 25-year-old Reeti Bajaj (name changed on request), a consultant with a tech firm, broke up with her boyfriend of three years, she decided to cut her long hair a week later. “I wanted to act abruptly, and changing my hair seemed like the quickest thing to alter about myself. I thought it wouldn’t mean anything and decided to go for a bob cut from my shoulder-length hair, but as the first snip happened, I cried like a baby. People asked if I was sure and wanted to go ahead with the haircut. I continued then, but later, I realised I was letting go of the person I was with the ex. And I wanted to change that about myself desperately.”
‘IT’S A VISIBLE REMINDER THAT HEALING ISN’T ALWAYS LOUD’
Dr Preeti Singh, Senior Consultant Clinical Psychology, Paras Health, Gurgaon, shares, “From a psychological perspective, this act is not uncommon during periods of emotional distress – like after a breakup, loss, or life transition. When words fall short, physical transformation can help communicate what someone is feeling internally – grief, anger, liberation, or hope.” She adds that in recent years, mental health professionals have acknowledged this as a coping mechanism. “While it might seem impulsive from the outside, for many, it’s a deeply personal ritual that helps them mark change and move forward. It’s a visible reminder that healing isn’t always loud; it can begin with something as simple, yet symbolic, as a haircut,” says the doctor.
‘The act is less about resistance and more about resurrection’
As someone who has worked with hairstyling for over three decades, Bharti Taneja, Founder & Director of Alps Group, sees a haircut “as a silent, aching dialogue between a person and their pain.” “When someone walks into my salon and says, ‘Just cut it off,’ they are not asking for style. They are asking to be freed,” she shares.
So, is it rebellious or a way to regain control? “Rebellion is loud and outward. Cutting your hair in distress is private; it’s sacred. I’ve seen people cry after the first snip – not because they regret it, but because something inside them has finally moved. The act is less about resistance and more about resurrection. It’s the softest form of saying, ‘I can’t go back to who I was,’” Bharti points out, “When everything in your life feels ungraspable – grief, heartbreak, illness – hair becomes the one visible, responsive thing. You cut it, colour it, shave it… and suddenly, you’ve done something. It’s the body’s way of saying, ‘See? I’m still here.’”
‘People cry after a haircut because something in them shifts’
Aashmeen Munjaal, owner of Star Makeup & Hair Academy, explains, “People cry after a haircut because something in them shifts. It is not always negative. They want to forget painful memories, they feel things are not in their control, and this is the only thing they can gain control over things. While you can’t change much of other physical aspects, hair can be changed instantly. It can be rebellion in some cases, but I feel it is more about their well-being.” Dr Singh adds, “Changing one’s appearance, especially something as personal and visible as hair, is often a way people try to cope with emotional stress. When someone is going through a difficult or overwhelming time, this kind of change can help them feel like they’re drawing a line between what they’ve been through and what comes next. It’s a way of saying, ‘That part of my life is over, and I’m ready to start again.’ Psychologically, it can offer comfort and a sense of control, especially when emotions feel too complicated to put into words.”
‘Hair holds memories for people, and sometimes, when they cut it, they are letting go of memories’
Zakir Khan, from Creme Salon adds, that people cut their hair when they are going through something difficult and when they want to change their outlook towards life. “I have a client, unke baal kaafi lambe thay aur woh kabhi nahi katati thi . Pata nahi unki kya ladai hui apne husband se , aur unhone apne baal kaafi short kara diye . Girls breakup ke baad bhi hair short kara leti hain. Ek baar ek girl ne breakup ke baad apne hair kaafi short karane ka bola, aur jab humne baal kaate toh woh bahut royi . Hair holds memories for people, and sometimes when they cut it, they feel that they are letting go of the memories. Positive way mein insaan tab baal katata hai jab usse positive outlook rakhna hota hai life ko leke . I have never seen men changing or cutting their hair post breakup. Log emotionally attached hote hain apne hair se. Hum jab subah uthte hain toh sabse pehle apne baal sawarte hain , we are too attached to our hair. So, when anything goes wrong, sometimes people think this is how they want to take revenge from someone who liked their hair,” he says.